Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #432

yeah I know you did not ask!

You should so be blessed – well cursed at times actually – with a mind such as mine, making all these weird connections between my rumored neurons. Just be thankful that I do not share all of my random thoughts.

I know how someone can make a fortune.

The Wee Dog has a semi-truck load full of dog toys.  Well, I should not exaggerate, they would only fill up a bobtail truck.  And Señora keeps buying more for her.

Thing is that after Princess Lily has had the toy for 10 minutes the squeaker stops working. There is a mountain of now squeak-less canine playthings in the corner of our family room.

I betcha… that if you could come up with a squeaker to put inside these pet baubles that would work for more than a few minutes you could corner the market.  That or a nation of pet owners would be at your door asking WTF have you done.

Just saying.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #8,069

yeah I know you did not ask!

As you surely know, the primary sensory input for canines is the sense of smell. Our particular canine, Princess Lily, has the common but  troubling habit of rolling in whatever odoriferous substance she can find. This seems to be some sort of bold statement for dogs – here I am, I know you can smell me now.

Of course, this results in Señora giving The Wee Dog frequent baths. Lily tolerates these baths, but just barely. But she is so happy when they are over that she runs around the house crazily for five minutes. Señora being Señora, chases the ecstatic Lily and everyone is having a good time.

Thinking about this other day I came to the conclusion that if our precious little dog was human she would  dress in wild, bold, colorful clothes that would generate jokes about needing sunglasses.

Loud smells, loud clothes, all in the same ballpark… smell me, look at me!

And so it goes

Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,611

yeah I know you did not ask!

Need more exercise to work on that Thanksgiving/Christmas belly?  Get a small dog.

I am not sure how many times a day I bend over to scratch The Wee Dog’s head, but it is a significant number. Princess Lily is only 7 kilograms and stands 30 centimeters at the shoulder, the dachshund portion of her DNA being expressed in her body shape.  She is slightly larger than your average cat and smaller than some of the larger felines.

It is nearly as good as doing 25 toe touches a day.

1 Lily scratch, 2 Lily scratch… no cheating now, bend from the waist, 3 Lily scratch…

Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.326

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

Last night I was lying in bed half asleep.  Señora was next to me watching the tail end of a TV show about Gilda Radner.  When the show was over she turned off the TV, and she leaned over to give me a good night kiss and hug.  During the hug I caressed her back and arms a bit, then I decided I needed to do the same to her hip and leg.  When I arrived there I had the thought, “she sure needs to shave her legs!”  That is when I realized The Wee Dog had weaseled her way in between the two of us.

And so it went with our little ménage à chienne.

Choice is Good

I have two frequent muses for my silly, little blog.  One is Señora. Most of the time she is okay with being my muse, sometimes she is tickled, and on occasion, she will arch one eyebrow and give me that look. After two bouts of the the brain fever known as matrimonitis I have gained enough “wisdom” to seek Señora‘s approval before releasing stories involving her into the wilds of cyberspace.

My other muse is The Wee Dog, aka Princess Lily, our 7 kilogram rescue dog. A year or so after we adopted her, on a whim – and on sale – we had her DNA tested.  She is 3/8 Bichon Frisé, 1/4 Dachshund, 1/8 Pomeranian, 1/8 Pekingese, 1/8 Shih Tzu and 100% adorable except to squirrels, rabbits, moles and especially chipmunks.

Señora and Princess Lily are essentially surgically/psychically/telepathically connected. Neither one of them can stand not knowing where the other is, generally they are in the same room together.  As revealed in True Confessions, I, by spells, have my roles to play in this ménage à chienne. For reasons known Continue reading “Choice is Good”