Tag: Señora

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Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.066

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

Almost out of the blue Señora said to me, “You would not make a very good MC on a game show.”

“Oh?,” said I, arching one eyebrow, a perplexed expression crossing my charming, handsome countenance, “why is that?”

“You get annoyed by people too easily,” she went on.

“So you think I am annoyed with you right now,” I echoed, dropping into my best active listening mode and reflecting back to her what I thought she had just said.

“Clearly that is true, my dear, dear sweet man,” Señora commented, only a little sarcastically.

“Well come on down and see if the Price is Right, your turn to spin, vowels are worth double, What is sarcasm, Alex?” for some reason seemed to be the necessary, if absolutely not the appropriate response.

Growing up with four brothers, I became very good at ducking.

And so it goes.

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Just call me Dr. Frankenstein

Señora and I went for a short stay a Pere Marquette Lodge to celebrate the February triplet of her birthday, Valentine’s Day and the anniversary of when we met, all happening within five days of each other.

Dr. Frankenstein’s Most Current Operation

For reasons inexplicable, early in this couple’s fiesta I related to Señora a behavior my ex developed late in Continue reading “Just call me Dr. Frankenstein”

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #8,069

yeah I know you did not ask!

As you surely know, the primary sensory input for canines is the sense of smell. Our particular canine, Princess Lily, has the common but  troubling habit of rolling in whatever odoriferous substance she can find. This seems to be some sort of bold statement for dogs – here I am, I know you can smell me now.

Of course, this results in Señora giving The Wee Dog frequent baths. Lily tolerates these baths, but just barely. But she is so happy when they are over that she runs around the house crazily for five minutes. Señora being Señora, chases the ecstatic Lily and everyone is having a good time.

Thinking about this other day I came to the conclusion that if our precious little dog was human she would  dress in wild, bold, colorful clothes that would generate jokes about needing sunglasses.

Loud smells, loud clothes, all in the same ballpark… smell me, look at me!

And so it goes

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Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.363

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

My 6′ 2″ self is sitting on the edge of the bed. Señora, all 5′ 2″ of her, standing at the foot of the bed, cutting her eyes between me and the juncture of the wall and ceiling above the bed, profoundly pronounces, “there sure are a lot of cobwebs up there.”

Apparently, once again, I opted for the incorrect response.  It definitely was not, “Well, you need to do something about that, don’t you?”

Perhaps if Señora would hand me a sheet of paper with the possible answers that were in a multiple choice format, and then give me sufficient time to study the answers…. nah, probably not, she would not let me get by with saying, “All of the above???”,  every time.

And so it goes.

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Word of the Day – Gerontophilia

  • Noun:  Gerontophilia
    1. sex attraction toward old persons 
      • at least on “da web”, it always seems to be considered a paraphilia although it is not described in the DSM
      • further more “da web” seems to only really consider it a paraphilia when it is a younger man attracted to a much older woman, go figure.
  • Synonyms:
    1. gerophilia
  • Usage:
    1. “The two drunk philosophers debated hotly for hours  as to whether Auguste Rodin’s statue ,The Old Courtesan (La Belle qui fut heaulmière), was an expression of gerontophilia or not.” — Oh yea of little faith, thinking I could not use the word gerontophilia in a sentence that made any real sense! Oops, just did it again.
  • Encountered:
    1. Señora and I were sitting on the love seat in the family room when I said something to her that was playful, but extremely raunchy.  For the sake of us, neither of us can remember what it was. For reasons she does not remember – the senior moments just keep stacking up – she put whatever the phrase was into Google.  The first thing that popped up was the definition of gerontophilia. And thus we both learned a new word.

To see more Words of the Day, visit this link: Words of the Day

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Do you know what…

Occasionally Señora and I will find ourselves alone, walking Princess Lily, riding in the car together, sitting around the firepit savoring a fine bottle  of 2020 Chambourcin from Stricker Weinkellers, obviously a wonderful time to have a deep, intimate or intellectual conversation about any number of topics. Señora has a propensity to start off these opportunities for erudite palaver with the phrase, “You know what…”.

Last time this happened I replied, “Which one, I know both the Watt boys.  I went to school with both of them.”

“What?”

“Yeah, I went to school with both the Watt boys, James and William.  Well William they generally call Bubba, but Continue reading “Do you know what…”

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Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.343

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

Although my overflowing fountain of creativity – that’s a yoke, son – at times has me wanting to send out a bus load of blog postings on some days, I generally try to keep it to one a day or less.  No need to overwhelm my extensive readership  with the mundane grumblings of a run-of-the-mill curmudgeon.

However… today I could not resist.  I am not feeling well and have spent most of the day in bed.  I have a memory of Señora at my bedside telling me she was going to the Valley (local area full of strip malls).  An hour or so later I needed a beverage and went down to the kitchen to find this dire warning on the kitchen counter from my loving spouse:

I Think I Have Been Insulted

And so it goes.

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Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.326

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

Last night I was lying in bed half asleep.  Señora was next to me watching the tail end of a TV show about Gilda Radner.  When the show was over she turned off the TV, and she leaned over to give me a good night kiss and hug.  During the hug I caressed her back and arms a bit, then I decided I needed to do the same to her hip and leg.  When I arrived there I had the thought, “she sure needs to shave her legs!”  That is when I realized The Wee Dog had weaseled her way in between the two of us.

And so it went with our little ménage à chienne.

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A Profligate, A Wastrel, A Dissipater


At times Señora is such a spendthrift.  She is attempting to convince me that I have maximized the utility of this particular pair of Sperry boat shoes.

Puts me in mind of a picture that was most likely put in the trash years ago.  I had a t-shirt commemorating Arkansas Razorback basketball that I wore for years when I jogged – in Arkansas.  It got to the point that there was no cotton left in the t-shirt. Just the base polyester weave, making it entirely see-through.  A picture was taken of me as I very reluctantly placed it ever so gently in the kitchen trash can.  I was thinking it still had a few more jogging miles in it.

Truth is I have a couple of other pairs of boat shoes that I purchased as I thought perhaps these were a little tacky to wear most places, nearly as bad as wearing a pair of house shoes to the supermarket.   Don’t tell Señora, but I did put them in the trash can today.  For some reason it had become almost impossible to keep rocks and dirt out of them.

And so they went.