Category: Rev. Joe Dirt’s Ramblings

The unsolicited, unreasoned, uninformed, unapologetic opinions of Rev. Joe Dirt

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Ozark Walk-About

Author’s note:  This is one of the first “long” pieces that I ever wrote. I believe this is from 2002. It was shortly after 9/11 and a job lost due to a corporate merger.  It was not the best of times to be looking for work in the IT field as literally every other programmer in America was doing the same thing.

I actually have it on another website of mine, but I wanted to bring it over to here to have my scribblings gathered together.

A 9 Day Walk-About in the Ozark Wilderness

Pseudo-philosophical babblings

Backpacking is occasionally just plain damn hard work, which sometimes makes it hard for me to explain my fascination with it.

In April when Jeff and I hiked the Grand Canyon we had gotten ourselves in reasonable shape by several training hikes in the Ozarks and Ouachitas.  If one can really call trekking through such beauty a training exercise.  Outside of the crowded coasts or someplace where it snows 13 months of the year, I cannot think of too many places in America more awe inspiring than the Ozarks.  I did not want conditioning to be an issue when I hiked to one Nature’s masterpieces, the Grand Canyon.

I usually walk and work out regularly, but with the way the job search has gone I have allowed depression to get hold of me.  Those activities have gone by the way side in favor of Gilligan’s Island reruns.  Go ahead, give me the opening premise, and I will give you the plot line.

One afternoon as I lay on the couch fantasizing Continue reading “Ozark Walk-About”

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All Christian denominations explained in 12 minutes | A short video

Many moons ago I worked with an Egyptian Database Administrator at the Saks data center in Jackson, MS. Besides Arabic, he, obviously spoke English, but his English was better than 99%of the native speakers in America.  He also spoke German as his parents, two college professors, had taught in Germany for many years.  He was and is a very bright man in many ways. He originally trained as an engineer, but discovered better money in administering huge corporate databases.

I was reasonably friendly with him, to the point of eating dinner at his house.  He was secular, but his wife was a very devote Muslim. I remember asking him if Muslims believed in hell. He responded adamantly with, “Oh do we ever believe in hell.”  And a tough hell it is, but you can get out of it, unlike Christian hell.

One night, at her request, I attempted to elucidate to his wife the various Christian denominations. I gave up in a short while as it was very tough slogging.  I did gift her a book on the various branches of Protestantism from either the Dummy series or Idiot series of books.  I really does boil down sometimes to how many angels are dancing on the head of a pin.

I wish I had had this little video to point her to.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,052


yeah I know you did not ask!

When I was younger I was too stupid to compromise.

Now that I am in my eighth decade, I am too set in my ways to compromise. Well that is not entirely true.  Most of the time I really do not give a… flip what other people do or think.  Unless it affects me in some way or we are in some way intimate.  In the last case just be discreet and leave an old man his delusions.

The thing is I do not remember a sweet spot where I balanced my needs with the needs of another person in a reasonable and sane manner.  Apparently I went straight from stupid to set in my ways.

And so it goes in my rush to the finish line.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,011


yeah I know you did not ask!

I wonder how many folks would have children, if instead of babies, they came into this world as teenagers!

Population crisis solved…

Now don’t go all technical on me.  Ultimately, it is only a silly thought experiment.

I am sure the thought of birthing a 180 pound high school linebacker would be enough enough to make any woman swoon.  Well, maybe not Bertha.  She is, after all, one of those Butt sisters and those gals are all a WHOLE LOT of womanhood.

Which reminds me of another posting of mine: Every Time I Went to Kiss Her

Perhaps instead of gestating in a woman’s womb, our children would incubate as eggs for five years before entering the world. This is how  Edgar Rice Burroughs described the continuation of the red humanoid species in his Mars series. No more late runs to the store for pickles and ice cream.

And so it goes.

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The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter

Click to see bigger

Click to see bigger

I save my blog articles off onto my hard drive, and remembering the three most important tasks in the information technology world, backup, backup, backup, my hard drive is also backed up.  One would think I have important sh… stuff on my computer to worry about.

For some wild reason, I decided the chore I needed to undertake was to PRINT off every single one of my blog articles. Since I have a laser printer these printed pages might take more than a season or two to fade away.  This was a project that took some time, went through four reams of three-hole paper, and a couple laser cartridges. The articles filled up Continue reading “The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter”

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The Black Hole…Karma?

So… just desserts – karma – or just bad execution? But either way the video cracked me up… but it does make you think. Sorry.

One common theme or fantasy is what superpower a person would want and what they would do with it. Frequently the superpower is the ability to fly like Superman, but not infrequently it is the ability to be invisible. Then the question becomes what to do with your invisibility.

I watched a YouTube video in Spanish of a person doing interviews in the street about the question of superpowers.  It seemed like a lot of folks who chose invisibility had ideas on how to use their invisibility that were less than ethical.

I will have to admit with some of the jobs I have had, I would not have been too far behind this guy into the safe… ethical or not.

My post from February 2020  on this theme: My Superpower

It is tough be human… and so it goes.

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Size 12, Myself

Tis a subject of which I have touched on in the past, the fact that our feet tend to enlarge as we age.  For most of my adult life I wore a size 10 or 10 1/2 shoe. I am not remembering exactly when, but at some point that changed to 10 1/2 or 11 size shoes, with the occasional cowboy boot checking in at 11 1/2.

One would think that the same style within a brand would have a consistent size over time.  I started wearing New Balance’s 990s running shoes a while back because they are mostly “Made in America”. I have several pairs, that are different colors, that are dedicated to different uses.  I have one pair that I wear only in the gym, another pair that are my daily walkers, and so forth.  New Balance updates Continue reading “Size 12, Myself”

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The Apocalypse…Very Soon

I follow my investments with  a portfolio on Google Finance.  For the first time since I don’t remember, every single investment was green, meaning the price has increased.

The Apocalypse is coming and very, very soon… there is absolutely no doubt about it in my mind.  Now is the moment to duck and cover under your desks while you still have time.

Or maybe I just have The Apocalypse on my mind after reading this article: Medvedev begins to frighten world with apocalypse. It almost seems like Putin would rather destroy the world than admit defeat in Ukraine.

And so it goes.