Category: Rev. Joe Dirt’s Ramblings

The unsolicited, unreasoned, uninformed, unapologetic opinions of Rev. Joe Dirt

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,052


yeah I know you did not ask!

When I was younger I was too stupid to compromise.

Now that I am in my eighth decade, I am too set in my ways to compromise. Well that is not entirely true.  Most of the time I really do not give a… flip what other people do or think.  Unless it affects me in some way or we are in some way intimate.  In the last case just be discreet and leave an old man his delusions.

The thing is I do not remember a sweet spot where I balanced my needs with the needs of another person in a reasonable and sane manner.  Apparently I went straight from stupid to set in my ways.

And so it goes in my rush to the finish line.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,011


yeah I know you did not ask!

I wonder how many folks would have children, if instead of babies, they came into this world as teenagers!

Population crisis solved…

Now don’t go all technical on me.  Ultimately, it is only a silly thought experiment.

I am sure the thought of birthing a 180 pound high school linebacker would be enough enough to make any woman swoon.  Well, maybe not Bertha.  She is, after all, one of those Butt sisters and those gals are all a WHOLE LOT of womanhood.

Which reminds me of another posting of mine: Every Time I Went to Kiss Her

Perhaps instead of gestating in a woman’s womb, our children would incubate as eggs for five years before entering the world. This is how  Edgar Rice Burroughs described the continuation of the red humanoid species in his Mars series. No more late runs to the store for pickles and ice cream.

And so it goes.

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The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter

Click to see bigger

Click to see bigger

I save my blog articles off onto my hard drive, and remembering the three most important tasks in the information technology world, backup, backup, backup, my hard drive is also backed up.  One would think I have important sh… stuff on my computer to worry about.

For some wild reason, I decided the chore I needed to undertake was to PRINT off every single one of my blog articles. Since I have a laser printer these printed pages might take more than a season or two to fade away.  This was a project that took some time, went through four reams of three-hole paper, and a couple laser cartridges. The articles filled up Continue reading “The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter”

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The Black Hole…Karma?

So… just desserts – karma – or just bad execution? But either way the video cracked me up… but it does make you think. Sorry.

One common theme or fantasy is what superpower a person would want and what they would do with it. Frequently the superpower is the ability to fly like Superman, but not infrequently it is the ability to be invisible. Then the question becomes what to do with your invisibility.

I watched a YouTube video in Spanish of a person doing interviews in the street about the question of superpowers.  It seemed like a lot of folks who chose invisibility had ideas on how to use their invisibility that were less than ethical.

I will have to admit with some of the jobs I have had, I would not have been too far behind this guy into the safe… ethical or not.

My post from February 2020  on this theme: My Superpower

It is tough be human… and so it goes.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #6,923


yeah I know you did not ask!

Ever feel like life is one big ad lib performance, and somehow you missed the set up line and went off on an unrelated tangent? Ever?

 

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Size 12, Myself

Tis a subject of which I have touched on in the past, the fact that our feet tend to enlarge as we age.  For most of my adult life I wore a size 10 or 10 1/2 shoe. I am not remembering exactly when, but at some point that changed to 10 1/2 or 11 size shoes, with the occasional cowboy boot checking in at 11 1/2.

One would think that the same style within a brand would have a consistent size over time.  I started wearing New Balance’s 990s running shoes a while back because they are mostly “Made in America”. I have several pairs, that are different colors, that are dedicated to different uses.  I have one pair that I wear only in the gym, another pair that are my daily walkers, and so forth.  New Balance updates Continue reading “Size 12, Myself”

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The Apocalypse…Very Soon

I follow my investments with  a portfolio on Google Finance.  For the first time since I don’t remember, every single investment was green, meaning the price has increased.

The Apocalypse is coming and very, very soon… there is absolutely no doubt about it in my mind.  Now is the moment to duck and cover under your desks while you still have time.

Or maybe I just have The Apocalypse on my mind after reading this article: Medvedev begins to frighten world with apocalypse. It almost seems like Putin would rather destroy the world than admit defeat in Ukraine.

And so it goes.

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Duck Dynasty Chinese Food

Occasionally Señora does not feel like preparing dinner.  When I hear this I offer to take us out to eat, but sometimes she just feels like staying in.  In that scenario we occasionally will get Chinese carryout.  This happens a handful of times every year.  I cannot say there is a Chinese carryout restaurant close that we are wild about, but Dynasty Chinese Restaurant on Clarkson is acceptable, most of the time. It is small, without seating, doing all its business as delivery or carryout, accepting only cash or checks.

There is another Chinese carryout restaurant close to our house that I liked the food better, but one night, going to pick up our order, I made the mistake of using their restroom.  I have not been back.

Every time I have gone to get our food at the store on Clarkson there is an older Caucasian guy working the counter.  I do not believe he has any ownership in the business, but he has Continue reading “Duck Dynasty Chinese Food”

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Masculine Hemline Index


There is a theory, The Hemline Index, that always seemed a little tongue-in-cheek to me, that women’s hemlines follow the stock market.  In good economic times the hemlines get shorter, in poor times they get longer.  Some proponents seem to think there is a reverse correlation between good economic times and women’s hemlines.

For a while now I have been wondering about the length of the inseam (aka hemline) of men’s shorts or what, back in my day, we called Bermuda shorts. Men’s shorts are omnipresent around St. Louis as there seems to a subset of Continue reading “Masculine Hemline Index”