Category: Rev. Joe Dirt’s Ramblings

The unsolicited, unreasoned, uninformed, unapologetic opinions of Rev. Joe Dirt

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The Unintended Lesson

dsc_0001aMy Uncle Dutch is not a tall man, and he has what we affectionately call a Buddha belly.  I know that he was skinny once upon a time.  I have seen pictures of him when he was young and in the Navy, but that is not the Harry Dodd I know.  He is elderly now, with white hair, and it is hard for me to not think of him in a suit and tie. The first thing that you will probably notice about my Uncle is his smile.   While he doesn’t smile all the time, it is certainly there more than it isn’t. And it is the type of smile that just lights up his whole face.

 He is married to my mother’s sister.  Now that I am older, I recognize her as kind, gentle, woman. Continue reading “The Unintended Lesson”

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Resources for Responsible Consumption of Seafood

sardine

Monterey Bay Aquarium Seafood Watch

Marine Stewardship Council

 US Seafood Choices Alliance

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Your spouse is being chased by a sweet young thing…

young-man-woman_x16447805A friend sent me the following via email.  An interesting question that was on a reality show recently.   Currently, the only thing my TV is hooked up to is a DVD player, and I like it that way.   Anyway so I did not see this show. 

She said her and her significant other would have handled it much differently.

The question is below:

Ok, you’re at a party with your significant other.  Folks at the party know that you’re in a monogamous long term relationship.  There are drinks at the party and some folks that you don’t generally hang out with.  A younger attractive girl sits on the arm of your chair on the patio.  There are several people on the patio.  Later, the same girl is talking to you while you are both standing, but is getting a bit closer than casual conversation would dictate.   Your choices are:  

  1.  The significant other comes over and informs the sweet young thing that you are taken.
  2. Significant other sees what is going on and decides to let it pass a chalk it up to too much to drink.  She does this knowing that the relationship is secure.
  3. You kindly excuse yourself as soon as it is polite and stay closer to your date.
  4. The significant other goes to the hostess and asks if she could redirect her friend.  

How would you have handle the situtation?

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I Don’t Even Want To Be Alive Anymore

IF ONLY…rush

“I know there are a lot of people out there who are upset about some of the things I’ve been saying on my radio program lately. My comments about the situation in Haiti have hurt and angered many Americans who genuinely care about the plight of the Haitian people, and that hurt and anger will likely never go away. Many of you are probably wondering, “What would compel a human being to say things like that?” Well, here’s your answer: I am a very bad person. And, to tell you the truth, I don’t really want to be alive anymore”

Read the rest @ The Onion – I Don’t Even Want To Be Alive Anymore

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Aunt Katy Gives an Anatomy Lesson

steer-grill_48It was summer, and we were in Oklahoma again. Back from the east coast, and our urban life style.

It was early in the morning, and I was at Aunt Katy’s house. I was not very old, I’m thinking 3rd or 4th grade. She asked me if I wanted to go out to the ranch that day; they were going to make steers. That caught my interest as I thought steers came into the world the usual way; I did not know they were manufactured. Being an inquisitive child I asked her, “How do you make steers?”

She replied, “Well you know, they cut off their #%$”. I looked at her perplexed not understanding what #%$ meant. She proceeded to go through a list of slang terms for that portion of the male anatomy, with me looking puzzled the whole time. Continue reading “Aunt Katy Gives an Anatomy Lesson”

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Steak and Kidney Pie

steak-and-kidney-pieOne of my favorite stories about my mother involves Agatha Christie. When I was in high school she really enjoyed reading these mystery novels by the famed English author. Apparently, a popular dish in England and Agatha Christie’s novels is steak and kidney pie. My mother decided it sounded delicious, and one evening when my father was not going to be home for dinner she decided to make the dish. The fact that she waited until her husband was not going to be there will give the reader a clue as to what is coming next.

She found a recipe, and bought all the ingredients. I’m sure the steak and kidney were not cheap. She prepared the dish and put it before us unsuspecting guinea pigs, oops I mean boys. After a bite or two, none of us would eat anymore, and remember we were teenage boys aka bottomless pits. My mother became very upset, and began to cry. The funny part is after a bite or two of Agatha’s dish, she decide she did not want anymore either.

We never saw steak and kidney pie again.

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If I was not so damn old, and Canada so damn cold

Court eases business, union election spending rule — Link removed

From the above article:
“The Supreme Court threw out a 63-year-old law designed to restrain the influence of big business and unions on elections Thursday, ruling that corporations may spend as freely as they like to support or oppose candidates for president and Congress. The decision could drastically alter who gives and gets hundreds of millions of dollars in this year’s crucial midterm elections.”

All together now…

I pledge allegiance to the registered trade mark
Of the United Corporations of America
And to the greed for which it stands
One conglomerate under  Adam Smith
Outsourced, with excessive profit
And power for an chosen few

If I was not so damn old, and Canada so damn cold, I would immigrate. I hate what the Right is doing to this country. I used to be proud to say I was American. That has not been true for quite some time now.

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WTF is Right

From an online discussion (I just love civilized discourse):

Obama is the president. He can only sign the bill the house of representatives pass and send to his desk.  Executive branch cannot make the legislative branch do anything they do not want. Clinton tried in 1992. How did that go….. 

As for the Legislative branch: If I remember, the Soap went something like this:

 GOP: we will block and sabatoge anything important to Obama no matter what

 (Senate Dems : kisses Olympia snow’s butt to try and get 60 votes. But apparently party loyalty is more important than the country…) Continue reading “WTF is Right”

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Skinning Rats

It was the fall of 1978,  my son was five years old and my daughter 8.  They were “knee high to a grasshopper” as they say in Arklahoma.  I was attending Central State University, since renamed to the University of Central Oklahoma.  I was majoring in Biology.

Why Biology?  First I had a real love for the science.  Secondly, I had always done well in this branch of the sciences.  I had basically been forced into a business degree program my first year of college and nearly flunked out.  It was a lack of interest and other factors (partying???).  In retrospect I might have better served myself and my family to have gotten my computer science degree at that time rather than the B.S. in Biology.  The punch cards intimidated me, and at time I had doubts about my intellectual capacity.  Dissecting struck me as easier than flow charts. Plus, I’ve made a real study of coming to the fork in the road and taking the wrong tine.

This particular semester I was taking several courses, but Mammalogy 4263 taught by Dr. Caire is of interest here.  Dr. Caire had his M.S. in rats, and his PhD Continue reading “Skinning Rats”