Category: Rev. Joe Dirt’s Ramblings

The unsolicited, unreasoned, uninformed, unapologetic opinions of Rev. Joe Dirt

Posted on

Bottle of Tequila

He saw me limping down the hallway and asked,”looks like you had a wonderful time, what happened?” When he said that I was instantly back to her bedroom and recalling the events of the previous evening…

We had placed a few pillows behind our backs up against the headboard.  The lights were still low.  The Coltrane CD had started back around.  Man, is he ever timeless. With the warm glow that can only be felt from energy well spent, we were both smoking cigarettes and idly chit chatting about absolutely nothing of consequence.  I noticed that we had both pulled our knees toward our chests.  The result was two well formed tents, side by side in the sheets.  Mine was a good bit taller than hers.  My mind flitted back to childhood days when my parents would take me to the circus.  I wondered which tent was more interesting.  Was it the larger one with the 3 rings of non-stop entertainment, or the smaller one with all the made up freaks and hucksters trying to separate you and your money? Laughing to myself I wondered where the “tunnel of love” was.

It was at that point I slapped myself softly and she looked at me funny.

“Just a weird thought,” I explained.

My vision drifted down to my left arm.  I realized that I had left my Rolex knock-off on.   It surprised me that she had not complained, Continue reading “Bottle of Tequila”

Posted on

Scuttlebutt

I found the origin of this word as used for gossip interesting.

Scuttlebutt in slang usage means rumor or gossip, deriving from the nautical term for the cask used to serve water.   Or in modern parlance gathering around the water cooler to gossip.

Growing up around the Navy bases I heard, “So what’s the scuttlebutt?” often.

Posted on

Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #9,369

…yeah I know you did not ask!

She was holding up the 15 or less line with nearly a full cart of groceries. (Why do the stores never say anything to these people?)  Then when the clerk announced her total she acted like it was a complete surprise.  It was only then that she started digging through her massive handbag looking for the exact correct change. Aggghhhhhhh!

Posted on

Easter Sunday & Friday the 13th

I was looking at things… So did you engage in an activity on July 13th, 1951 of a procreative nature?  A question posed to my 80 year old mother.  I wonder if she remembers or even will answer.

April 13th, 1952 I was born, an Easter Sunday.

I turned 21 on a Friday the 13th
I will turn 60 on a Friday the  13th.
I will reach my full retirement age of 66…on Friday the 13th, 2018

I’ve always considered turning 21 on Friday the 13th (and standing in front of a judge) a foreshadowing of the rest of the decaying rollercoaster ride that has been my life.  Does turning 60 on Friday the 13th foreshadow my senior years?  Does turning 66 on Friday the 13th foreshadow my retirement years.

Being conceived on Friday the 13th would explain the whole miserable lot. Taking my Okie calculator out of their gloves, it seems that it would have been a good statistical probability that I was launched into being on that infamous day.

Looking ahead – Easter Sunday is occurring on April the 13th occur in 2031 & 2036.  While both seem a little early to be checking out, they do have a certain synchronicity to them.  Of course, Easter occurs on April 1 in 2018, 2029 & 2040.  I like the irony of that.  Friday, April 13ths occur in 2029, 2035, 2040 and 2046.  On those days the irony and synchronicity are overwhelming.

You do not have a choice in when you were born.  You probably will not have a choice when you exit, but maybe…

Posted on

Rev. Joe’s Random Thought # 1,424

…yeah I know you did not ask!

They have started using a different brand/type of toilet paper at work.  It is no more than 60 grit.  It might be less.  I may ask my boss if I can file Workman’s Comp or get a stand up desk.

Posted on

Where have all our freedoms gone?

WHERE HAVE ALL THE LEADERS GONE
With deepest, deepest apologies to Pete Seeger

Where have all the children gone?
Long time passing
Where have all the children gone?
Long time ago
Where have all the children gone?
Grown to cynics every one
When will we ever learn?
When will we ever learn?

Where have all the cynics gone?
Long time passing
Where have all the cynics gone?
Long time ago
Where have all the cynics gone?
Ran for office every one Continue reading “Where have all our freedoms gone?”

Posted on

How Much Do You REALLY Love That New iPhone?

Another sad account of Foxconn and Apple and the high human cost of your iPhone: iEmpire: Apple’s Sordid Business Practices Are Even Worse Than You Think

Someone please tell what is right about unfettered capitalism be practiced globally with US in the lead.

Here is a link to a Forbes article listing the top 400 richest people in America. Number 400 has a net worth of $1 billion. Number 1 on the list, Bill Gates, has a worth of 59 billion. Six of the folks on this list made their wealth from Wal*Mart. Steve Jobs is number 39 with a paltry $7 billion. Michael Dell is number 18 with a worth of $15 billion.

Go to the top of the list and find the “source” heading. Click on Continue reading “How Much Do You REALLY Love That New iPhone?”

Posted on

This Is Mind Blowing…

This is one of the most mind blowing things I have heard in a while…

This is from a wonderful radio program / podcast Radio Lab.  Check them out at RadioLab.org

“Can you make your own universe? We usually think of the universe as ‘everything that exists,’ so how could you make another one?”

Posted on

The Dying Middle Class

I do not know a lot about BusinessInsider.com, but it does not strike as a progressive or liberal leaning web site.  Their stated view is that of business, and business in this country is definitely not in the liberal camp. All that makes it even more interesting that they would run the following article: 30 Statistics That Show The Middle Class Is Dying Right In Front Of Our Eyes

A couple quotes from the article to titillate your curiosity.

“Every single day, more Americans fall out of the middle class and into poverty  In fact, more Americans fell into poverty last year than has ever been recorded before. The number of middle class jobs and middle class neighborhoods continues to decline at a staggering pace.””

“Today, only 55.3 percent of all Americans between the ages of 16 and 29 have jobs.”

IMHO, the Occupy Wall Street movement has it right.  As long as the wealth gap grows the problem will continue. As long as corporations control our government and politicians it is not going to get any better.  The sad part is that so many Americans have bought in to the rhetoric of Libertarians, the Tea Party, etc.   As long as we continue to buy the proposition that any tax is bad, the rich will continue to be under taxed and the diminishing middle class will carry the burden.  As long as we continue with the myth of rugged individualism in this country will we not do the things we need to do to have a sane society.   As long as we continue to support businesses that have marched our jobs overseas, the headlong rush to all of us fighting over jobs flipping burgers will go on.  At some point we need to dig our collective heads out of our asses and fight back.  I wish I was hopefully that we will.

Sigh…

Posted on

Tough Guy CPR With The Bee Gees

Just to keep it clear and unconfused — the emergency number in the U.S.A is 911

Interesting enough, Queens’ Another One Bites The Dust also has the right beat for CPR.  I think I will stay with the Bee Gees Stayin’ Alive.