Tag: Saks

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Let’s Rumble…

In my painful attempts at writing, in my paltry efforts to describe Señora, I frequently refer back to her relationship with her mother. What her mother wanted was a petite, sylphlike, polished Jewish American Princess, JAP as they are commonly referred to. What the stork brought was from the Russian peasant side of the family, very much an Earth Mother, very much not a JAP, very much to the chagrin of both parties.

Señora has a very good friend that she has known since they were 16. Señora‘s friend would have checked off all the items on Señora’s mother’s menu of a perfect JAP daughter.   I cannot imagine finding her in the middle of an Ozark stream building cairns like an Earth Mother of my acquaintance. Because they occupy opposite ends of the Jewish American Princess spectrum, I tend to think of them as a case of opposites attracting.

Let’s Rumble…

I bring her up as she is Continue reading “Let’s Rumble…”

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It is a wonder…

It is a wonder that I have kept any job.

In 2001 I took a programming job with Saks at their Information Technology center in Jackson, Mississippi.  It is a long story how it came to be there, I will not bore you. At that time Saks was the parent company of Saks Fifth Avenue, and three other department store chains.

The week I started the departmental secretary sent me an email requesting that I write a short blurb about myself.  She was going to put my “bio” and the photograph from my ID badge on the departmental bulletin board to introduce me to everyone.  I did so, she did so, but she failed to read  my expository remarks, simply cutting and pasting my profundities into her document.

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A few days later she came to me all excited asking about what I had written, insistent that I “correct” it.  Unfortunately not every one gets my sublime sense of humor.  It might also be the reason that a year or so later when I asked her out, she was very adamant about having to wash her hair seven nights a week.

Just in case you cannot read the verbiage in the image here is what I wrote:

“David joined SAKS in February of this year. He came from American Electric Power in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He is working as a Senior Programmer with Greg Kinsley’s IT Logistics Team. David has two kids and a granddaughter. They reside just outside Ft. Smith, AR. David resides in the Reservoir area.  His interests include golf, photography, fishing and backpacking. He volunteers part-time with the Frankenstein Laboratory of Experimental Humanity.”

And so it goes.