Tag: randomness

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #9,794

yeah I know you did not ask!

Beware – “adult” themed.

I wonder if this will become a new put down –”You’re no Pete Davidson.”

Or perhaps a woman being asked about her date last night.  She sighs and says, “Well… he definitely was no Pete Davidson.”

On the high probability that you have not been following the stupid news aka celebrity news, just type “Pete Davidson 10” into your favorite browser. The main reason I know anything about this is that Stephen Colbert make a joke about it.  Not understanding his reference, but suspecting, I did a Google search.

This puts me in mind of an article I posted years ago, Penis Sizes Of World Religious Figures,  which linked to the satirical article by Jim Goad of the same name, Penis Sizes Of World Religious Figures . At the bottom of that article was another link (I sweating from clicking all these links), 50 Women Talk About Having Sex With An Extremely Large (Or Extremely Small) Penis. All I can say is, “While I am the yin to your yang Pete, I am sorry, we all have crosses to bear.”

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,719

yeah I know you did not ask!

This morning I was visiting with one of my Spanish tutors for conversational practice.  This particular gentleman lives in El Salvador.   I had been telling him about our trip to visit the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC. As conversations tend to do, we rambled, leading to our discussing property taxes which they do not have in El Salvador and most of the Central American countries.

“How nice,” I said, “we pay close to $6,000 a year on this house here  in the St. Louis suburb of Chesterfield.” I then went on to explain that if we did not pay our property taxes the government would seize the house and sell it for those taxes.

To which he replied, “Basically then you are just renting from the government.”

He may have a point.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,825

yeah I know you did not ask!

Ahhh… the rumble of plastic rollers upon the pavement  as a swarm of trash and recycling bins are pushed, pulled or dragged to be perched on the curb in anticipation of offering their contents to the cacophonous, blue agent of the alien region, simply known as  Fieldlandia.  It must be the eve of Thursday trash day.

Gotta love the soundtrack of suburbia .

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #8,535

yeah I know you did not ask!

Me speaking commandingly to myself, “Job is not done until the tools are put away, David Stephen.”

Me replying to myself somewhat sarcastically, “Sir, Yes Sir, Daddy, Sir.”

Admittedly being orderly and maintaining your tools and equipment are not bad habits to have. However, my father routinely employed a Victorian modality of instruction with his five progeny. It is not a method formulated to foster fond memories.  As he had a successful career, I can only assume that he utilized a different instructional paradigm when imparting information in his capacity as a technical representative for an aerospace company.

My name/names within the family and extended family are a whole other blog posting… but don’t hold your breath.

And so it goes.

 

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #1,833

yeah I know you did not ask!

I was filling out a form online today that required the input of my birthday.  Instead of allowing me to type it in, the site was forcing me through a series of drop down boxes. I scrolled until I found April, actually Apr, and selected it. I then scrolled down a series of numbers until I found the unlucky number that corresponds with the correct day of April.  Finally I needed  to scroll down to find my birth year.  For some reason it started with 2022  – as if they pop out of the womb knowing how to interact with a computers.  Anyway, I scrolled and scrolled and scrolled, and before I came to the correct year I had to jump up and take bathroom break… that is when you KNOW you are old.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,000

yeah I know you did not ask!

This “random thought” may be somewhat obscure to many readers, but to those of us who know JMR, it will relate immediately.

JMR takes walks regularly and drives quite a bit for various reasons.  All of us in his circle are use to frequently getting calls from him at these times as he has had a thought he needs to share.

Reflecting on this, it is obvious to me that this is his method of sharing in the same vein as Rev. Joe’s Random Thoughts.  The acorns do not fall too far from the oak tree.  Of course his method has the advantage of not floating around the Internet to come back and bite him.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #5,123

yeah I know you did not ask!

Flipping through Twitter I came across yet another selfie from a self-described “patriot”. This gentleman was overweight, shirtless but wearing a military style flak vest, and thrusting his assault rifle to the forefront of the picture so it would look bigger. The coup de gras for me was his tattoo.  From all appearances, a homemade job from a very drunk comrade displaying “Liberty” above an indecipherable line drawing  with “Or Death” underneath that. I’ve seen prison tattoos more artfully executed.

I am convinced that some organization or government is slipping a substance into the national beer supply. It is giving these “patriots” a deluded vision of manhood as a result of pernicious impotence. Given the imbibing propensities of Americans, spiking only 2 or 3 national brands – usually light – would do the trick.

Another good reason to drink imported beer.

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #563

yeah I know you did not ask!

The other day I was at home, dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt.  Needing to go to the store, I tucked in my shirt as it was cold enough to need a light jacket.  While I do it a times, I think it looks a bit sloppy to have your shirt tail hanging out beneath your jacket.

Upon seeing me with my shirt tucked in, admittedly rare for me, Señora said, “My, my, how fancifed you are. Where are you going?” Well not her exact words, but the sentiment is the same.

I’m thinking this retirement gig has lowered our standards a bit.