Boys Will Be Boys

golf-cartI generally work a half day on Fridays which allows me to go golfing in the afternoon if the weather is nice.  At the course I generally go to, they have a senior scramble Friday mornings.  When I say senior,  I mean most of the guys appear to be in their 60s and 70s. They are generally in the club house when I get there between 1 and 2.  They are going over the standings, prizes, etc. If not that they are in the parking lot unloading their golf carts.

I check in, and go to the first tee.  As I am warming up I hear all this racket, gravel spewing, old men laughing hysterically  and cheering.  I look through the woods to the graveled parking lot to discover that they are having golf cart drag races.

Of course, at this point in the round, more than a few Budweiser have had their tops popped.  However, boys will be boys no matter their age.

Southern friendly vs. Midwestern friendly

We were out with a group of folks a while back and I made a comment about southern folk being friendly.  It was not mlp_fim_luna_woona_by_atticus83-d4a5eximeant to disparage Midwesterners, but one fellow did take slight umbrage.  He replied that Midwesterners were friendly too.

All things are relative.  Compared to folks in the northeast Midwesterners are extremely friendly.  Having lived in all three areas I have some experience with the general friendliness of the denizens of each.

Perhaps the best example I can give would be the golf course.  I have lived and played golf in the southern states of Arkansas, Oklahoma, Mississippi and Tennessee.  It is not uncommon for me to go to a golf course by my lonesome.  In the aforementioned states, I generally did not play by myself very often.  Generally if you were a single someone would ask you to join their group.  It was acceptable behavior to request to join a group that was smaller than a foursome.   In a new area after going to the same course a few times, you tend to bump in the same folks.  Pretty soon you have a group of golf buddies. Continue reading “Southern friendly vs. Midwestern friendly”

Just do the Funky Leon

I have a dear friend whom I have known for 7 or 8 years.  His name is Leon, but I tend to call him many things.  Brother Leon or Brother J are two of my favorite, not that he is associated with a church in any capacity. It just seems to fit.

When I lived a little further south I used to golf with him at least once a week.  In the nice part of the year that once a week was usually  2 or 3 times a week.  Life being what life is.  And the economy being what it is, I have moved a couple times since I first met him.  I’ve gone from being a military brat to a computer gypsy.  Anyway you look at it I am not gathering any moss.

We do try to get together a few times a year to play golf and renew our friendship.  Needless to say, Brother Leon knows my swing well.  Since he does, I do not mind him giving me advice about my swing from time to time.  He is usually dead on as to my particular issue that day.  I could blame my mediocre golf game on lack of any real athletic ability!  Well, okay, I will do that.  One of my poorer tendencies in my golf swing is to get way too fast.  Fast in golf swing seldom equates to distance or a  good ball flight. Continue reading “Just do the Funky Leon”

Buying Vehicles via Internet

I’ve bought two cars via the Internet now.  The first was a used car and the second was a new vehicle.

I found my 2006 Mazda MX-5 on Autotrader.com.  It was 9 months old at the time.  A guy about my age had it, but was marrying a younger woman with two kids.  He needed a family car, and was sadly selling his sports car.  She must have been quite a woman.  I checked the Carfax report and that came back clean.  The car was actually in Albuquerque and I was in St. Louis.  However, I have a cousin in Albuquerque who is a car guy and into sports cars.  He went by and took a look at the Mazda and drove it, and reassured me that it was in good condition.  I made a very good deal with the gentleman because as “they” say he was a very motivated seller.  That motivation and the fact that he had been having a hard time finding a buyer worked in my favor.  I hopped on a plane, Continue reading “Buying Vehicles via Internet”

Robin, One Hot…

We are all products of time, place and the Darwinian lottery that selects our parents. Robin is no different.  Robin’s parents were not any different.

Robin spent much of youth practicing the piano.  She loves music, but she has talked about how she sometimes longed to be outside with other kids.  Robin has natural athletic ability, but in the 50s and 60s in the St. Louis enclave of Olivette young ladies were not encouraged in this arena.  While her brothers were encouraged to participate in sports she was forgotten.

Robin is short, but very strong physically.  She helped me move a while back, and it was all I could do to keep up with her.  Continue reading “Robin, One Hot…”

The Garbage Man

Many moons ago when I lived in Ft. Smith, AR I went out to the golf course to play a round.  At Ben Geren if you do this they tend to group singles together.  This works out nicely for several reasons.  It keeps the pace of play better.  You can get more folks on the golf course.  Singles are not frustrated waiting on foursomes.  It also has the added benefit of allowing you to play with folks with which you might not otherwise share a round of golf. 

On this particular day they paired me with a young man, a twenty something.  He was obviously working class.  I put myself in that category, but white collar.  Continue reading “The Garbage Man”

Are you really going to walk all 18 holes, mister?

A regular golf course is generally 6000 to 6500 yards long.  That is 3.4 to 3.7 miles.  If you are like me when you play golf, it is never a straight line.  I am guessing that in a round of golf I probably walk 4 to 4 ½ miles.  A reasonably healthy individual should be able to do that in an hour of brisk walking.

A round of golf usually takes approximately 4 hours.  Theoretically you are walking at the blistering pace of 1 mile per hour.  In reality there is a fair amount of standing around, and then brisk walking to your ball.  I carry my bag, throw in some elevation changes, and you have a reasonable amount of exercise.  The figures I have seen say about 7 calories per minute playing golf if you are walking and carrying your bag.  That means you are burning up around 1700 calories as long as you stay away from the beer concession.

This is not the first time I’ve been asked, “Are you really going to walk all 18 holes?”  This time it was by 4 young men in their late teens or very early 20s.  These young men all looked in good health, and were not carrying the excess weight of many of their peers.  We conversed a little, and they just could not imagine walking the course.

I walk because a) I enjoy the game more when I am walking.  Buzzing around in a cart brings in a rushed dimension to the game I do not like.  b) I love the exercise.  I am in reasonable shape compared to many of my peers.  Walking the golf course is one the things that helps maintain my fitness.  c)  I’m cheap and I like to play a lot of golf.  Paying for a cart adds $10 to $15 to the price of a round of golf.

I knew one young man whose reason for not walking was he did not want anyone to think he could not afford a cart!!!  What a load of baloney.

Some golf courses will not let you play during certain hours unless you rent a cart.  I do know some walkers slow things down a little.  I’m not so sure that is a bad thing.  I’ve golfed with far too many folks early in day that acted like playing 18 holes was just another chore to finish.  That strikes me a missing one of the key joys of golf.

I have frequently played with folks in carts while I walked.  Unless they are extremely good golfers with the ball in the fairway all the time I keep up with them.  Frequently I am waiting on them.

I will acknowledge that for many folks if they did not have a cart there would be no place to carry the cooler of beer.  Golf in this case just becomes an activity to do while drinking.  Oh well.

I just see so many folks that would benefit from the mild exercise golfing provides, yet they feel they must ride or they cannot play.  Given the current obesity epidemic how wonderful it would be if a few of these folks jumped off their carts and walked.

Or at least they could at least quit acting like I was nuts for doing so.

Etiquette Questions

Scenario #1 – You are in Safeway, Saks Fifth Avenue, Wal-Mart, wherever it is that you like you like to shop.  The Sweet Young Thing  (SYT) in front of you decides to get something from the bottom shelf.  In order to do so she bends over from the waist revealing the required tattoo in the small of her back.

Etiquette question #1 – Are you allowed to compliment her on her tattoo?

Etiquette question #2 – Let’s say for the sake of argument the answer to question one is yes.  Can you then go on to compliment her on her pretty thong?

Scenario # 2 – I was at the golf course paying my green fee.  The bar maid / cashier had a form fitting zip up sweatshirt. The zipper was pulled down or only pulled up to a point about a hands width above her belly button.  This revealed (among other things) a pretty white lacy bra.

Etiquette question # 3 – Am I allowed to ask what detergent she uses to keep her unmentionables so white?