Tag: epitaph

• Noun/Adjective:  Caitiff  (Archaic)
  1.  noun
     • A despicable coward; a wretch.
     • A mean villain; a despicable knave; one who is both wicked and mean.
  2. adjective
     • Despicable and cowardly.
• Synonyms:
  1. villain
  2. brute
  3. savage
  4. monster
  5. devil
  6. wretch
  7. offender
  8. criminal
  9. knave
  10. beast
• Usage:
  1. “I think you mean caitiff. You just misspelled it.”
• Encountered: In the following text exchange with a superannuated golfing buddy that lives in the Magnolia State.  I had passed along the following cartoon with the comment that I had found the epitaph for my tombstone —  never mind that I want to be cremated.

To which he replied, “This is something I don’t have to worry about. Niceness is not in my vocabulary.”

I responded with, “I am a saint, myself.”

Parrying he said, “I think you mean caitiff. You just misspelled it”

With a feint and lunge, I remarked, “I see that doctorate paid off.”

In response, I received, “Told you I had no niceness in me.”

“No true,” I riposted, “You gifted me a new word!”

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