Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #2,011


yeah I know you did not ask!

I wonder how many folks would have children, if instead of babies, they came into this world as teenagers!

Population crisis solved…

Now don’t go all technical on me.  Ultimately, it is only a silly thought experiment.

I am sure the thought of birthing a 180 pound high school linebacker would be enough enough to make any woman swoon.  Well, maybe not Bertha.  She is, after all, one of those Butt sisters and those gals are all a WHOLE LOT of womanhood.

Which reminds me of another posting of mine: Every Time I Went to Kiss Her

Perhaps instead of gestating in a woman’s womb, our children would incubate as eggs for five years before entering the world. This is how  Edgar Rice Burroughs described the continuation of the red humanoid species in his Mars series. No more late runs to the store for pickles and ice cream.

And so it goes.

Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5784.260

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

There are certain reoccurring household chores that I prefer that I do rather than Señora. I tell Señora that I want to do these tasks as I have a system. Sometimes she even listens.

I will be doing some task around the abode and Señora will ask if I would like some help.  Sometimes I accept her aid, but, not infrequently, I will say thanks, but no thanks, I have a system.

Obviously my system is no more than the OCD part of me needing to do something a particular way.  Whether it is better or not is debatable, but do not tell that to the little monkey riding my back.

Being, ahem, seniors, Señora and I both have regular medicine that we take. We keep our personal stashes in different places. In both stashes are to be found bottles of acetaminophen.  I emptied my bottle of the last two pills the other day.  Since I was running down to the valley to do some shopping I asked Señora if we had any more acetaminophen.  If not I would purchase some.  At first she thought we were out, but then she discovered a brand new container in her stash.

She brought the new bottle into my man cave as I was sitting in front of my computer.  I very gently suggested that she pull the empty pill bottle out of my recycling can that sits next to my desk.  She sat both bottles down in front of me.

I said,  “you could have poured some from your bottle into my bottle.”

“Oh no,” she replied, “I thought you might have a system and need to count them.”

One feature of long term relationships is that sometimes the other person knows you much, much too well.

And for the record, I did not count them… thank you very much.

And so it goes.

The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter

Click to see bigger

Click to see bigger

I save my blog articles off onto my hard drive, and remembering the three most important tasks in the information technology world, backup, backup, backup, my hard drive is also backed up.  One would think I have important sh… stuff on my computer to worry about.

For some wild reason, I decided the chore I needed to undertake was to PRINT off every single one of my blog articles. Since I have a laser printer these printed pages might take more than a season or two to fade away.  This was a project that took some time, went through four reams of three-hole paper, and a couple laser cartridges. The articles filled up Continue reading “The Tale of the Five Binders or A Monkey with a Typewriter”

Word of the Day -Pareidolia

  • Noun: Pareidolia
    1. the tendency to perceive a specific, often meaningful image in a random or ambiguous visual pattern
      • The scientific explanation for some people is pareidolia, or the human ability to see shapes or make pictures out of randomness. Think of the Rorschach inkblot test. — Pamela Ferdinand
  • Synonyms:
      1. apophenia
  • Usage:
      1. “Welcome to a world where reality transforms into a vibrant stage of facial expressions and intriguing characters. In the course of my daily life, I stumbled upon a hidden treasure: pareidolias that have made me smile, ponder, and sometimes even burst into laughter.”
  • Encountered:
      1.  Scrolling through my Google news feed I saw the clickbait title from a Borepanda.com article: 30 Pareidolias That Have Made Me Smile, Ponder, And Sometimes Even Burst Into Laughter

To see more Words of the Day, visit this link: Words of the Day

Matrimonial Log – Star Date 5783.257

“Matrimony… the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Casamiento Segundo, its until-death-do-us-part mission… to explore a strange new relationship… to seek out a new life and new adventures… to boldly go where no sane couple has gone before.”

Señora has a common female habit of removing her brassiere when she comes home.  She lays this unique feminine article of apparel in various places: on the sofa; on the coffee table; the kitchen table; occasionally casually tossing them in the direction of a chair in the family room. By spells her knocker lockers actually land on the chair rather than the floor. Not infrequently she forgets that they are there, or perhaps thinks she will take them upstairs in a bit.  A bit sometimes being in a day or two.

A while back I started taking her over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders and hanging then in various places:  one of the light fixtures over either the dining room table or kitchen table; the track lighting behind the couch; one of the decorative arms of the clock in the family room; etc.

Not uncommonly her double-barreled slingshot will stay there for a day or two. Occasionally they have been there for several days. Señora suddenly discovers her booby holster and becomes quite agitated with yours truly… much to my perverted delight.  She always asks how long her keeper-of-heavenly delights has been there.   So far no one has been in our house and asked why a bra is hanging from the chandler over the dining room table, or perhaps they were polite enough to ignore it.

Am I wrong? I hope not.  It is quite entertaining.

And so it goes.

New Balance, The New “IN” Sneaker

Several months ago a group of us old fogeys went to a local comedy club here in St. Louis.  The reason we went was that the niece of one of the gentlemen in the group was the opening act. She was reasonably funny with many of her comedic stories stemming from the 13 years she spent teaching on the South Side of Chicago.

The headliner was a black man (for the sake of me I cannot remember his name) married to a red headed white woman. They have a couple of biracial children. I mention that as a good part of his act was edgy racial humor centered on his personal life situation. At some point, not sure how he segued to the subject, he got onto old white folks and Continue reading “New Balance, The New “IN” Sneaker”

Word of the Day – Schadenfreude

  • Noun: Schadenfreude
    1.  Often capitalized: enjoyment obtained from the troubles of others
    2. Did you know? Schadenfreude is a combination of the German nouns Schaden, meaning “damage” or “harm,” and Freude, meaning “joy.” So it makes sense that schadenfreude means joy over some harm or misfortune suffered by another.
  • Synonyms:
      1.  gloat
      2. epicaricacy
      3. malicious glee
      4. ghoulish joy
      5. lulz
  • Usage:
      1. “The great Burning Man Muddening of 2023 was almost scientifically engineered to evoke schadenfreude. Wealthy, insufferable attendees? Check. Improbable details, such as the fact that the rain was causing a bunch of three-eyed fairy shrimp, which can survive as eggs in sediment for decades, to come alive? Check. The fact that climate activists, angry about private jets and single-use plastics at the event, tried to shut down the festival and were jeered at by annoyed attendees, then vindicated by mother nature? Check. A situation that was uncomfortable but not life-threatening? Check! (I should note that one person did die at the festival, but organisers have clarified that it wasn’t related to the weather.)”
  • Encountered:
      1.   An article on Guardian.com: Why all the Burning Man schadenfreude? Where do I start …

One of my brothers used this word in a group text recently.  At the time I did not know the meaning, and little ole OCD me had to look it up.  Probably because I am now aware of it, the word has popped a few times in my readings and conversations.  Are you stalking me schadenfreude?

To see more Words of the Day, visit this link: Words of the Day