Category: Rev. Joe Dirt’s Ramblings

The unsolicited, unreasoned, uninformed, unapologetic opinions of Rev. Joe Dirt

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #9,786

yeah I know you did not ask!

In 2005 the Country and Western artist Toby Keith had a big hit with the song, As Good as I Once Was.  In case you were off the planet then, here a link to a video of the song: As Good as I Once Was

The story line of the song is that a  gentleman is in a bar and twin girls try to pick him up for a threesome.  He then utters the catch line of his song, “I ain’t as good as I once was, but I’m as good once As I ever was“.

I am aware it is just a song and probably not autobiographical, but… At the time the song came out, Toby Keith would have been around 44.  I saw recently that Toby will be turning 60 this year, by some reckonings, a senior citizen. I imagine that he is still singing the song in concerts, given his senior citizen status, perhaps he should revise his famous line to this: “I ain’t as good as I once was, but I’m as good once As I ever was… SOMETIMES“.

 

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Mars and Venus — Whatever Country

I was Skyping with my young Mexican tutor who lives in Honduras this morning.   He told me the following joke:

¿En qué se parecen las mujeres y las canciones en inglés?
Yo tampoco lo entiendo, pero me gustan los dos.

Or in English:

How are women and songs in English alike?
I don’t understand either, but I like them both.

Seems like male / female relationships are the same in whatever culture the two genders exist.

 

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #4,845

yeah I know you did not ask!

After much gnashing of teeth, after much scrutinizing of checking  accounts, after accepting that she would not be 21 again, Señora bit the proverbial bullet and bought herself hearing aids.

This purchased has wrought an unexpected change in my life. In the past when we had a cross transaction I was wont to mutter some reply under my mustache, knowing that it was very unlikely that she would hear my utterance, thus avoiding fueling whatever fire was raging.  If she noticed my lips moving, and asked what I said, I would disingenuously reply, “That I love you.”  That is no longer an option. I know this to be true as I was in my man cave upstairs talking back to a balky computer when from the kitchen downstairs I heard her ask, “What did you say dear?”

Hopefully I am not too old a dog to learn a new trick, and can avoid being taken to the pound.

Let me see, how many cliches did I manage to get into three short paragraphs…

Keep well.

 

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Rev. Joe buys a blow-up doll

In any workplace with one or more persons, you are likely to encounter one or more “characters”.  My first job in Information Technology was with a large national manufacturing concern at their Ft. Smith, AR plant, at that time their administrative offices were also there. For reasons unclear, hopefully not dark and mysterious, there dwelt more than the normal allowance of characters at the plant and offices, perhaps a birds-of-a-feather phenomenon.

One such character was Jon, a computer operator who had worked  there for many years.   Jon did not achieve his character-hood for his activities at work, but for his personal life.  He had been married 7 or 8 times, no one was quite sure, Continue reading “Rev. Joe buys a blow-up doll”

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Rev. Joe’s Random Thought #8,222

yeah I know you did not ask!

For some reason I was wondering if The 3 Stooges had groupies.  And then I was wondering how that worked as you very seldom saw them solo.  For some reason the term sado-masochism comes to mind…  I’ll leave you to draw your own images.

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Senator Josh Hawley, Unacceptable…

For reasons unfathomable to me, the citizens of Missouri turned out a very capable and very moderate Democratic Senator Claire McCaskill in favor of the Republican candidate, wanna-be Proud Boy Josh Hawley.  He spent the first part of tenure fairly quietly in Washington.  With the presidential election he came completely out of the closet.  When he decided to be one of the Senators that would oppose the electors for Biden I wrote him the following letter via his website. Continue reading “Senator Josh Hawley, Unacceptable…”

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Artifact or Angel

Robin was taking some pictures with her phone.  It has a function which can do a motion capture of 6 or 8 images.  This makes your still photograph act like it should be at Hogwarts.

There is an interesting phenomenon happening in the middle of the picture that we cannot explain.  I am pretty sure that this is some sort of artifact of lighting or camera movement, perhaps the light reflecting off a passing vehicle.

Señora, however,  is convinced it is an alien entering our space-time continuum from a rip in the fabric of the universe.  Or possibly an angel…

Anybody have a possible explanation?  You can appreciate it more  if your go to full screen.

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Polio Vaccination

If you are of a certain age…old now, you might remember these cards and the big push to get everyone vaccinated against polio.  I came across this immunization certificate going through a box of papers from my mother’s house.  I also have the cards for Type 2 and Type 3.  I think my mother must have filled in my name as it looks like her handwriting.

The card is from the Orange County Medical Society which is in New Jersey.  As there is a Navy base in the area Continue reading “Polio Vaccination”