Author: Rev. Joe Dirt

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Ten Commandments for Politicians

I’m trying to come up with ten commandments for politicians. This is a far as I have gotten:

  1. First, do ye no harm
  2. The majority rules, not the dollars
  3. Ye live in a glass house, act accordingly
  4. Thou shall avoid in all ways the trough of the lobbyist
  5. If it looks like pork, if it oinks like pork, if it sizzles like pork, vote ye not on it
  6. Remember ye that Squealor was not right, “All animals ARE equal, but some and no animals are more equal than others.” This includes politicians and government officials.
  7. Usufruct – Remember ye that we are but Stewards for those that come after us, as those who came before were Stewards for us.
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Car Accident

I rear ended a car a few days ago…

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!! and he was pissed!

He looked up at me and said “I am NOT happy!”

I said, “Then which one are you?”

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I wow yet another SYT

This is not as delicious a tale as the time I was bucked off the treadmill while trying to flirt with a sweet young thing. Nor is it as embarrassing as the time I was looking for a cat while the cell phone in my pant’s pocket was meowing at me. But it does typify my life
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Press 1 for English, NO Thanks

I had to activate a new credit card the other day. I called the 1-800 number given. What I heard was “Press one to continue in English, Prensa dos a continuar en espanol, or stay on the line if you are calling from a rotary phone and the next available operator will assist you.”
Continue reading “Press 1 for English, NO Thanks”

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Congressional Pay Raises

I was utterly shocked to see that Congress is considering voting itself a $4,400 pay raise.

If it based on merit and what they have accomplished, it ought to be a negative pay raise.

When Congress gets us out of Iraq, brings real ethical reform to Congress, and does something about illegal immigration, and then they can give themselves a pay raise.   Until then they should suffer like the rest of us with declining buying power.

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What I Believe

A friend recently asked me to write about what I believe for a religious studies class she was taking at her local Catholic church.   I believe she asked as she knows that I am a little ways from center in my beliefs. 

I came across the following quote that seems to summarize my beliefs:

We believe in the formless and eternal Tao, and we recognize all personified deities as being mere human constructs.  We reject hatred, intolerance, and unnecessary violence, and embrace harmony, love and learning, as we are taught by Nature.  We place our trust and our lives in the Tao, that we may live in peace and balance with the Universe, both in this mortal life and beyond.  ~~~~ Creed of the Western Reform Taoist Congregation Continue reading “What I Believe”

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We Happened Upon Death

My mother’s birthday was going to fall in the middle of the week, so I decided to drive down to Muskogee for the weekend to celebrate it with her. Saturday, we drove to Tulsa, and we went shopping for her a birthday present. Afterwards we had lunch a Macaroni Grill. Since it was such a nice day I decided to take the slower way back to Muskogee rather than the turnpike.

As we were nearing her house traffic on US 69, a major artery, came to a stop. After a while we began to inch forward. I could see three ambulances near the intersection; two different fire department vehicles had passed us as well as a multitude of police vehicles.
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What Religion is God

The question has been asked before, What religion is God?

Hajj, the pilgrimage to Mecca, is one of the five pillars of Islam.  It is a once in a life time requirement of every able-bodied Muslim. The pilgrimage must take place during the second week of the Islamic month, Dhul Hijjah.  During the Hajj, there are many rituals to be observed in a short period of time. One is the Stoning of the Devil, a reenactment of the Devil tempting Abraham three times as he prepared to sacrifice his son, Isaac.
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I have been disfranchised.

I’ve voted in every national election, as well as most local elections, since 1972s Nixon vs. McGovern.  I am seriously considering not voting this time.  Why? Because I have been disfranchised.  Never mind the various amendments guaranteeing voting privileges; the current system negates individual votes.

Continue reading “I have been disfranchised.”

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Disney Orgy

Orignally in The Realist in 1967 as black and white.  It was so successful they made a colorized version and sold it as a poster.

Paul Krassner passed away in 2019 and his website is no longer active.  SO I have not found anywhere to buy this poster except for big bucks on various sites like eBay. Oh well.

Click picture to see bigger