As some of y’all might know I am an ordained minister. Actually I am doubly ordained. My first ordination is from the Universal Life Church of Modesto, California. 
I originally became ordained because of the good Christians at Saks where I worked in Jackson, MS several years ago. Even though I was not worried about my soul, they were. So I became ordained and posted the certificate in my cube. If they came by cube with their evangelizing I would point to the certificate and invite to my services…basically we met every Friday night down at Joe’s Bar and Grill. They pretty much left me alone after that. Along with the certificate I received a wallet card and a license plate holder. I sometime pull the wallet card out in various discussions.
I am a big fan of The Dude in the film The Big Lebowski. A few years ago Robin had me ordained as a Dudeist priest. I usually say I am a Dudeist priest of the Pastafarian Monastery. It is all in good fun, although I can legally do anything a pastor/minister/priest can do.
I typically gas up at the same gas station/convenience store close to the house. This particularly store has a couple long term employees. One them is a friendly fellow about my age, covered with tattoos, and very short cropped hair. I was filling my pick-em-up truck today, daydreaming about nothing as I did so. When I finished I turned around and saw the above fellow leaning out of his car window.
He said, “Universal Life Church of Modesto, California”, as he looked at the license plate holder on the front of my truck.
I replied, ‘Yes sir, you can get ordained via the Internet.”
Grinning he answered, “Anyone who has been to prison has been ordained by the Universal Life Church.”
Not quite knowing how to reply, I gave him the thumbs up.
I supposed my 3 days in the Rhode Island State Penitentiary would technically count. See Rev. Joe Goes to The Big House.